Production Resource: Another Spartan

You are a production resource when…

1. The feeling of a Sunday evening creeps you out!
2. Petrol prices kill you faster than your cigarette costs!
3. The appraisals depress you, more than a Sunday evening.
4. You want a Monday off.
5. You can never get a Monday off.
6. You regularly miss the office official login time.
7. You dream about bugs and JIRA during Saturday afternoon naps.
8. Your neighbor’s pet tortoise is faster than your broadband connection, both at home and office.
9. Your parents expect you to help them in their daily chores on weekends, which…you eventually do!
10. Despite all this, you still are happy to be alive and face another Monday just to say – Life mast hai re. Tu suna!

Growing Up...

When I was a kid things were pretty simple. I had limited needs. Even a single rupee made me happy. I would love to get wet in the rain. Ride my bicycle to places I wanted to. Clothes mom bought were cool. I would play Mario without worrying about competition. I would read Tinkle comics relishing watermelon prepared by my mom. I didn’t need money. I needed love and I got it from my family. I would laugh at myself; I would cry in front of everybody. I loved the color pink along with black, yellow, red, and purple. I would pray sincerely and truly love GOD. I didn’t have girlfriends, but girls as best friends. I would love to race with my friends and laugh when I lost it. Cricket was good as I would get a second chance to bat. I would draw and color. I always felt life is beautiful.

Now I’m an adult. I worry about money. I worry about getting wet in the rain thinking people would judge me. Also, I might catch a cold. I’m always in dire need of money. I need branded clothes. I criticize even the advanced video games. I run to win the race. I look at girls beyond looking at them just as friends. Cricket now is a game I only watch. Pink is supposed to be gay. My prayers are selfish. I can’t cry in front of anyone. I hate to watch myself lose. I can’t laugh at myself. I feel life is mean.

So, is growing up really worth it?

Please Don't Try This...Ever!

Straight to the point. 10 things you must never do:

1. Challenge GOD. Although Leanardo got lucky, Titanic never did...


2. Add your immediate family member(s) on Facebook. They would question you, cross-question you, till they prove their point. Don't even think of using the Ignore feature now. It's too late...


3. Comment on your girlfriend's Dad or about her weight. We all know this universal rule, but we never learn! *Left black-eyed*


4. Take panga with a Delhi female. Never do that...never! And this explains the right black-eye...


5. Leave your phone at your desk with a 'Dance Dance' ringtone. People would never dance. At best, they would frown, if you consider that a dance step...


6. Try to explain what Instructional Designing is. Ensure you bookmark the Wiki page on Instructional Designing. However, the latest Risk Analysis Report states that if your network is down, you're doomed...


7. Buy clothes from Big Bazaar. They never fit when you reach home. After first wash, it camouflages with clothes from Jinny and Johnny...


8. Never listen to Alvito Cabral if he suggests a short-cut to a destination. Forget reaching quick, chances are you would never reach...


9. Try to be Bear Grylls. Forget the jigar to do what he does, we simply don't have the money and water proof cameras. Yes, I travel everyday in a Virar bound train. Isn't it death defying? Bear Grylls, are you listening...


10. Dress up like Lady Gaga. In most cases, the dressing up is not the difficult bit, but justifying why you're dressed up like that is...

And that's 2011!

Well, once again the year has come to an end. This time it is spelled as 2011. What a year it has been! A year full of changes. Real big changes; changes in emotions, feelings, people around, and a lot more.


To start off the year took off really well. Got a new job, got adjusted to it pretty quick. Also, got the work station of my choice. My work station is locked and loaded with pictures- friends, family, and the rest of the world. Was blessed with great bay mates - Ritu-G, Shailesh, Asha-G. Then, all of them quit and I got blessed with newer bay-mates, Romy a.k.a Punjabi Gaddafi, Sachin a.k.a Anger, Nitin a.k.a Sumdi, Komal a.k.a Lata-G, and not to forget Ram a.k.a Silent Killer. Till now, I have no complains with the great things happening at work including multiple deliverables and a thousand bugs on JIRA...(the TIS version of 12 days of Christmas!)

A long awaited wait for the ultimate bike was fulfilled- Bulletbaby a.k.a Maggie! It was indeed love at first sight when Suresh bhai decided to show me the baby for the deal. By the grace and mercy of GOD the deal was sealed with Rs 10,000/-. Baki amount delivery kay baad. With another round of 10K spend on paint and miscellaneous fixes, she was ready to roar as good as a new one, but not as good as the new Bullets. I'm glad it doesn't work that way. Maggie, you will always be loved. In return ho sakey tho petrol kam peena.

A major setback for me this year was the loss of my dearest, most precious, and loved brother Rohan. It kills me to decipher the fact that he is not around me anymore. He will always be missed and loved. Bro, wherever you are, we all love you; love you even more now and miss you. I humbly request all you readers to pray for his soul. Love you Joe forever and we will meet soon!

To end this year, GOD gave me the blessing of having a Jiju,Sunil as he and my eldest sister Vinola were bound together in Holy Matrimony. It was a good time to meet all my cousins and celebrate. The whole ceremony fell in place with the grace and mercy of JESUS. Great end to a year I must say!

So, good bye year 2011. Thank you for all the good and bad memories you gave me. 2012, the bar has been raised, so keep my happy.

Writer Blog...Block...Blod...Ahhhrgghhhh!

As the title suggests, I have been diagnosed with Writer's block. Can't pick the write, I mean right words, can't built, i mean build sentences, can't reed, I mean read. Wonder why this is happening? Now, since I'm wondering, I can list down the top 3 reasons for a writer's block. So, listed below are three reasons of a writer's block: [Yes, I'm in the eLearning domain. I'm sure the lead line suggests that...]

1. Correcting others
   Serious damage can be caused as the hunter becomes the pray, I mean prey. You go out to correct others, lekin Aila la! You forget your language basic. English language, you got me!
   



2. Start
   You know the destination. You know the journey's tough...but…*Sunny deal yell*… can someone tell me where to start. This has been a major crisis with myself's, myselves, I mean with me these days. Double-click the Chrome icon, type the google link, and now what? What do I google to get me fixed? Yeah kya ho raha hai...yeh kya ho raha hai...
   



3. Write, but no read
   Correct! Write, but no read. You content write, but book no read. Thinking you know all the words and sentences. But, ask me what's a noun and I will tell you the term Children fits in well. How can children be a noun? Isn't it a verb? Mai bhi naah kabhi kabhi. *goofy giggles*
   

There are many more reasons, but folks stop getting personal now. So, with just three reasons, you have reached the end of this blog post. This is an SOS and if anybody hears me, reads me, feels me…(ok..ok…) suggest methods to recover.

Adios!

Pak Gaya

Firstly, the title has no reference to Pakistan. Yes, it is another day of boredom at work. This is probably because of the review cycles and the client changes request. Kaheka request? Anyways, the client has been requesting /inverted quotes expression\ to include so many interracial graphics in the courses, it has impacted my blog graphics too. Image dekh, image.

To feed my learning hunger, I’ve decided to be an active twitter. Lol, yeah this statement did crack me up too. Trust me if you follow the right tweets, you learn folks. Further, I shall be downloading some cool apps *Ahhh! I feel cold, do you?*. See see, joke mara, joke mara.

P.S: Only good thing for today, gaon had rickshaw strike so I got to ride my BulletBaby! Oh! I’m turning into a rash rider these days. May be coz the roads were empty? We shall see…

Is GOD really there?

With so many hungry people around me...
Is GOD really there?
But, I was fed well.

With so many people homeless...
Is GOD really there?
But, I had a beautiful place called home.

With so many people who are lonely...
Is GOD really there?
But, I had the best of people as friends.

With so many addicts around me...
Is GOD really there?
But, I had received redemption.

With so many orphans around me...
Is GOD really there?
But, I had both mom and dad.

With so many people carrying heavy loads...
Is GOD really there?
But, my cross was light.

With so many unemployed and depressed youths around me...
Is GOD really there?
But, I had a satisfying job.

With many struggling in the storm of financial crisis...
Is GOD really there?
But, I had all my financial needs taken care of.

With so many people looking for good health…
Is GOD really there?
But, I was healthy.

With so many not knowing GOD...
Is GOD really there?
But, I have a responsibility to fulfill!

Amen!