Sunday, February 28, 2010

What's Your Name?


The characters in this post are not fictitious and any resemblance to persons living or dead is purely non-coincidental.

Hello folks. It’s been a while I have blogged, but I’m back again to share yet another goof-up. This has happened last year in the month of November. It was a time when I was looking for a break in Instructional Designing. And yes, dad there exists something called Instructional Designing. LOL.

It was morning 10am and I had to head for an interview to a company. Around 11am, armed with my resume, a blue cello techno tip pen, bag (more of a bag pack), blessings of my mommy and my dad still wondering what the hell is my son talking about I took the 11:10 am train from my place; Bhayandar. Around 12:00pm I reached andheri and after a battle with the rickshaw-wala’s I finally managed to get a rick for Seepz. I reached the venue as decided without any delay. I was made to go thru and hour long test and then made to further wait. It was the conference room of the company and along with me sat a girl. From her face I could make out she was a victim of the over-educated and unemployed phenomenon. She looked cute and on the qualification front she had definitely kicked my ass (an MCA grad). So, after a long unwanted silence I decided to speak. “Hi, what’s your name I asked?” She said, “ ”. You readers must be wondering why the blank space? Because the moment she said it, it was directly proportional to my 7seconds delay in the memory buffer of my head. In aam janta, language, I forgot. Yes, the very moment she said it. I don’t know how but I forgot. After a good 10-15 minutes there came a sentence where I had to take her name. Now, here’s the solution if it was a guy. If I don’t know a guys name, I substitute with DUDE. Even shove the word instead of repeating the guys name ova and ova again. I know the female word for the word Dude, but I can’t use it. It’s too freaking odd. What do I do? 3seconds had passed and it’s quite a delay if you are in a continuous conversation. I looked at her body language, her dressing sense, her accent and all I said was Aarti. I don’t know why, but that’s what my head told my tongue to say. And immediately I was like, “I’m a jackass”. For all those who wanted to call me a jackass, don’t get happy, Read the f**kin whole thing.

After answering a few questions from Aarti, (Still wondering why I’m addressing her that? Keep reading.) I was really petrified and wanted to know her real name. All this while thou I made sure I pronounced Aarti at a decibel lower than the other words of the sentence. Then came the HR coordinator and looking at me she asked Aarti. I still could not figure out why she called me by a chick’s name but I was even more petrified when she said Aarti. She must know her name. I was sure; she had her resume. Aarti your test is over and we will give you a call and get back to you. I was like, WTF? Her real name is Aarti? I could not believe my ears. I was really wondering if it was my ear buds that were slipping away. No, her real name was Aarti. It was such a delight to guess the right name of the chick. I really felt I was in the wrong field because I could be in the “Tell your furture” business and guess people’s name by just looking at them. See! But on a serious note it was an experience I will never forget. Now, the problem is I have forgotten her face but I know her name. The situation is reversed. But not to worry, I know the peoples name by just looking at them, don’t I?

Sunday, February 7, 2010

8 Idiots....



[Start: Calvin Sharman Joshi]

Saari umar hum coding try kartey rhey gayeh
Ek code bhi aaj tak compile nahi huaa…..

[End: Calvin Sharman Joshi]


(Guitar intro)

Saaari umar hum coding try kartey reh gayeh
Ek code bhi aaj tak compile nahi huaa. (x2)

Naaa naaaa naaa…naa naa naaaa naaa naa naaa….

Give me some thanda, give me some chai,
Give me another time-pass, coding fucked me once again. (x3)

[Start: Calvin Sharman Joshi]

Papa ney career scope ka lalach dikhaya.
Bsc (IT) choose karkey saala mistake kar dala,

Joel Julian ney pada coding,
Uska kehna tha- coding is scoring.

Notepad mein padha C, C++, C-Sharp, Java.
Object Oriented programming ney pooora……poora booch mar dala.

[End: Calvin Sharman Joshi]


Salary tho fuck all, appraisal bhi gaya,
Aaj bhi code, compile nahi ho paya. (x2)

[Guitar Lead]
[Piano Lead]

Saari umar hum coding try kartey rhey gayeh
Ek code bhi aaj tak compile nahi huaa…..

Naaa naaaa naaa…naa naa naaaa naaa naa naaa….

Give me some thanda, give me some chai,
Give me another time-pass, coding fucked me once again. (x3)

Naaa naaaa naaa…naa naa naaaa naaa naa naaa….