Top 5!

Top 5 lies
5. I’m not drunk.
4. I will call you in sometime.
3. I’m not well.
2. I had bath.
1. I love you.



Top 5 ways to be a hip-hop artist
5. Wear big white sports shoes. Only white.
4. Pierce your ears and wear your mama’s diamond studs.
3. Add a ‘Yaw’, ‘dawg’, ‘shake that girl’ in one sentence twice or thrice.
2. Wear 3 kgs of junk jewellery.
1. Buy a ‘XXL’ t-shirt when your size is ‘S’.


Top 5 ways to get rid of your girlfriend
5. Call her for coffee and don’t show up.
4. Don’t laugh on her jokes.
3. Make her pay the bill- every time.
2. Call her to Virar in the evening by a local train and again don’t show up.
1. Abuse her father.


Top 5 things not to say on a date
5. Waaaaazaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaup bitchhhh!
4. How old are you?
3. I can see your bra.
2. See, here’s my nude pic. You want it?
1. Your poonch is bigger than mine.


Top 5 ways to get into a Virar local
5. Get a ferocious dog- probably a Doberman.
4. Grow dreadlocks.
3. Go by handicap coach.
2. Scream Ramesh when the train just comes. 90% will look around even if their name is not Ramesh.
1. “Side! Side! Maachi paaani.”